England to Win Everything and Anything This Year Say Pundits

FOOTBALL TV columnists and pundits have declared England champions of everything they take part in, after their shock win over German in Berlin at the weekend.

Without thinking, Germany doesn’t take friendlies too seriously, didn’t deter ex-players and pundits in television and radio shows.

One pundit, who we’d love to name but he has been so out of touch and so far out of the game we actually forgot it, said: “Beating the world champions means we must be the world’s number one team, right?”

Another declared England will ‘win the EURO 2016 in France this year’ while another told UEFA just to ‘hand the trophy over to Roy Hodgson’s men now and we can all get on with our lives.’

Fans up and down the country believe England’s new-found injection of young players all playing well together will mean England will now win the Eurovision Song Contest, the 2016 Subbuteo Championships, The 2016 Blow Football Cup, the 2016 Homeless World Cup, the 2016 Thug Trophy and the Heavy Drinkers’ 2016 Shield.

Despite England’s setback against Holland last night, England believe the 2-1 defeat doesn’t count because ‘Holland didn’t qualify for EURO 2016’.


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